Bad Album Cover of the Day

Via LP Cover Lover:

Good to know so many of life’s activities can be done with a bare bottom.

This little gay gem features men singing songs like:

It’s So Nice to Have a Man Around the House
Boy Wanted
He Needs Me
Make the Man Love Me
How Did He Look?

When Goody Bags Become Poopy Bags

Via horseandhound.co.uk:

Paris racetrack parcels up posh poo for racegoers

A racetrack in Paris sent visitors home with a unique, and somewhat smelly, souvenir last weekend — a goody bag of horse manure.

Racegoers left the Paris Vincennes trotting track on Saturday (11 April) with high hopes for champion roses as they carried out their bags of dung, fresh from the champion trotters.

Francais said the gifted manure is “high-end, 100% natural, guaranteed non-genetically modified and French-origin”.

Sneak previews of the top-quality manure— presented in red velveteen jewellery-style boxes — were released prior to the event.

The plush containers were accompanied by a diagram of a pile of horse manure on a red silk cushion stating: “When champions grow, so do our plants”.

“Horse dung has a great reputation,” said Cheval Francais. “When used on indoor plants or on balconies, it improves the bloom, the colours and the life of flowers. In a garden, it does wonders for tomatoes, potatoes and roses.”

2009 Wacky Warning Winner

Via M-LAW:

2009 Winners of the Wacky Warning Label Contest were recently announced. Now in its 12th year, the internationally known contest is sponsored by the Foundation for Fair Civil Justice. Millions of people around the world will read stories or watch television news reports about the contest and laugh at how silly the warning labels are.

Bob Dorigo Jones, who developed the contest, explained that behind these silly labels is a serious public policy concern—America’s out-of-whack system of civil justice. The contest reveals how lawsuits and the fear of lawsuits have driven companies to spend millions on common-sense warnings.

This year’s winner is a submission from Steve Shiflett of Hampton, Georgia. The label is attached to a portable toilet seat for outdoorsmen called “The Off-Road Commode” because it is designed to attach to a vehicle’s trailer hitch.

The warning label reads “Not for use on moving vehicles”.

Finalists included:

• A wart removal product instruction guide that warns, “Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet.”
• A label on the underside of a cereal bowl warns, “Always use this product with adult supervision.”
• A small, 1” x 4” LCD panel warns, “Do not eat the LCD panel.”
• A bag of livestock castration rings warns, “For animal use only.”

It is kind of sad that there is a product that rivals the Bumper Dumper. Do we really need this many people crapping off the back of a pickup truck?

School of the Amazingly Idiotic Lessons

Via CBS News:

Driving Teacher Allegedly Drunk During Lesson
A driving instructor who police say was drunk while giving someone a driving lesson can stay out of jail but will lose his license for a year. Daniel Winsky, 53, of Salem was convicted Thursday of operating under the influence while giving a lesson from the passenger seat of a car. He was sentenced to 18 months probation but won’t be a licensed driver for one year.

Winsky was not behind the wheel during the December 2007 lesson in Ipswich, but prosecutors say he was in control of the passenger side brakes in the specially-fitted car and also moved the wheel during the lesson.

Police pulled Winsky over shortly after a convenience store clerk smelled alcohol on his breath, then saw him enter the auto school’s car. Winsky claimed he was not drunk during the lesson.

Bad Album Cover of the Day

Via LP Cover Lover:

Erm…that’s just creepy.

How Not to Learn a Lesson

Via mlive.com:

Man arrested twice in one day with pot

From a Kalamazoo Department of Public Safety news release titled, “Oops, I did it again”:

Officers at about 1:30 p.m. Wednesday picked up a 17-year-old Kalamazoo man standing in the 500 block of Ada Street rolling a marijuana cigarette.

They arrested him on charges of marijuana possession.

He posted a $100 bond and was released.

Less than an hour later, officers found him back in the 500 block of Ada Street rolling another marijuana cigarette and in possession of crack cocaine.

They arrested him again.

The man, who was not identified in the release, is now lodged in the Kalamazoo County Jail on charges of possession of cocaine, possession of marijuana and for violating his bond conditions.

But How Much Crappy Software Will I Have To Download?

Via Billboardom:

Fresh Commercial Gem

Holy singing, jumping 80’s in a Miami Vice blazer, Batman! I guess Alexander had a few too many of these burgers before he got to Seinfeld.

Sexy Cereal

Via CBS News:

Cereal Box Typo Sends Callers To Phone Sex Line

An Oregon company has ordered new packaging for its Peace Cereal after a typo on the box sent callers to a phone sex line instead of the cereal maker’s 800 number. Instead of reaching Golden Temple of Oregon, callers were greeted by a recorded voice asking, “Do you love sex? … Isn’t that why you called?”

Spokeswoman Elissa Brown said Eugene, Ore.-based Golden Temple ordered new packaging when the mistake was discovered in December and new boxes have been shipping out for weeks.

However, 13 varieties of the cereal were on shelves Wednesday at one Halfway, Md., grocery store, including seven varieties in boxes bearing the incorrect telephone number.

This Was Bound to Happen

Via USA Today:

Ohio man charged with drunken driving on bar stool

Authorities in Ohio say a man has been charged with drunken driving after crashing his motorized bar stool.

Police in Newark, 30 miles east of Columbus, say when they responded to a report of a crash with injuries on March 4, they found a man who had wrecked a bar stool powered by a deconstructed lawn mower.

Twenty-eight-year Kile Wygle was hospitalized for minor injuries. Police say he was charged with operating a vehicle while intoxicated after he told an officer at the hospital that he had consumed 15 beers. Wygle told police his motorized bar stool can go up to 38 mph.

Wygle has pleaded not guilty and has requested a jury trial.